Step 2: Shatter your expectations. . .

I know what you’re thinking: What’s with that title given the excitement of your last post?

I’m glad you asked. See, the glue and I were having a difference of opinions – still – as to how I expected it to come out of the nozzle versus how approximate it felt it could get to molasses in a Fargo winter. Needless to say, it won – for the majority of this build, but then I learned a devious trick (which I’ll get to later).

So, I crack open the IKEA-style manual and dig through the plastic sheets that make no sense to me at this point and find my drones.

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Both of them. Don’t be fooled, folks, although the book does clearly show four examples of what drones you can build, you will only ever have two. Those two. The saucer shapes – the TWO saucer shapes in the left – yeah, that’s it. Thanks for the options GW.

I looked up what the drones did and decided to go with the twin gun and shield drones because more firepower is always good and shields are a nice defensive option – really it didn’t come with enough to build TWO twin gun types so it is what it is. Fun.

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The shield drone gets two bunny ears, the twin gun only gets one – I don’t know why, I don’t make the rules, I just play by them. But there they are on the assembly line. Before the antennas went on they reminded me of Batteries Not Included and the little aliens saucers – of which there were more than TWO.

Moving on, though. . .

I snip-snip-snipped through all the pieces and made Johnny-5 a couple of swinging teammates to ride-or-die with him: El’Timbeh & Hu’Lii’Ahn – there’s a lot of guaperia in that unit so I had to pick names that were appropriate.

(Some will catch the reference to El Pichy Films 299 – some will read this and wonder silently to themselves – you’re welcome.)

But, here they are:

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The shield drone looks like it is hovering a little lower, because – guess what – they don’t send you even sized sticks. So if you have OCD, and you can’t pretend that it doesn’t BOTHER you that one hovers SLIGHTLY lower than the other one, then you’ll be just fine as is – like me.

I also decided not to make J-5’s head look in a permanent focal point, opting instead to leave it un-glued so as to let it swivel (as the mission dictates). The side-eye will be strong with him. I’ll make sure of it.

After that I took a little break. Made myself a sandwich. Had some chips. Thought about the spatial difference between the two drones. Ushered the thought out of my mind, and then decided to come back to the table and get Tim up and ready to lead his troops – because that’s the kind of leader Tim is.

And by this point the glue and I weren’t on speaking terms. I needed it, so I kept my voice at an even level. I never screamed. I never threw anything across the room. I breathed in positivity. I breathed out negativity. Angrily breathed out negativity. Right at the bottle. But we settled our differences and we came together to build something wonderful in Tim.

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I felt like the angry, screaming orders face had this right-ness to it – given the trials and tribulations of this blasted glue bottle. And he’s got a knife. And a sidearm. And that shoulder-pad (that they give you two of for every soldier even though the manual clearly states they only wear one).

After that, a wave of accomplishment crashed over me and I leaned back in admiration of my own work. And then the hover distance caught my eye – AGAIN.

Can’t be helped.

But, at least I’m learning new things as I trudge forward: Not building one troop at a time has been the major lesson here. I’d built J-5, the none-matching drones, and Tim here one by one. I called it an assembly line earlier because that’s what it became. I lined up torsos, heads, backpacks, arms, and their accoutrements before I ever touched the glue bottle. I kept the bottle upside down so it was ready to pump out it’s snail-like clear trail onto the units as I worked each individual body part for the whole of the troops as opposed to working on a single troop at a time.

I’ll be back Monday with the rest of the Fire Team. Enjoy your weekend, and as always:

I hope to see you at the gaming table!

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